Neil, the Hero
by Qk
Summary: Neil's NOT a filler, and he's not JUST the seventh member of the team. He's the descendant of Narcissus, gosh darn it! It's time to prove his worth, and shut Archie's fat mouth once and for all! :Rated T for Teen 'cause K's not for Kool.:
1. The Day Archie Didn't Shut His Fat Mouth

**Disclaimer**: I will only say this once to avoid useless banter at the beginning of each chapter; I don't own Class of the Titans. If I did, Archie's hair would not look like a retarded poodle. ... And it would be blue.

**D/N:** For all of you who've been reading my YGO stories (I doubt there's any of you left. I haven't been on this site for about a decade... Or a couple months, whatever.), there's a nice note for you on my user lookup. Everyone else... enjoy. I'm going to be writing CotT fics for a while now, just because there's not enough Neil here, and the ones that _are_ here... I just find... sad and disappointing. Everyone cry with me and pray I can do a better job.

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Last week, Neil had decided to start titling his days.

Tuesday morning, Atlanta had come bursting into the dorms, sobbing and waving a black-lined envelope in her hand. She'd refused to open it, so Archie took it upon himself to read the letter aloud. Her grandmother had passed away. Atlanta spent the next fourteen hours in her room howling with grief, passed out to sleep for three hours, then woke up and trudged around in a terrible mood for the duration of the day. This, of course, led to Archie being in a foul mood, simply because Atlanta had promised to spar with him - sadly, it was the closest they'd managed to get to a date with Archie's backbone - and now she was too upset to follow through with it. Theresa was moody too, because she'd spent the whole night planning a rant for Jay about how she was tired of the 'distance growing between their once flourished and connected relationship' (once, of course, being three weeks ago) and he'd managed to squirm out of it by comparing the situation with Atlanta's predicament. This left Odie angry, because with Atlanta locked in her room and Neil just as barricaded in the shower washing every strand of his golden hair, Odie was the only one Theresa felt like raving to. Herry got upset because everyone else was upset, and Jay spent most of the day in a corner focusing on breathing. When Neil finally came of out the bathroom, he called it the 'Day No One Noticed My New Shampoo' and joined in with the sulking.

He later revised the title to the 'Day Everyone Was Angry' after careful consideration.

Wednesday was a bit better. Everyone was still tense from the day before, but it was a warm, soothing tenseness that kept everyone silent yet still able to apologise. Generally everyone just kept to themselves, nodding and trying to start a bit of small chat before realising it was useless, until at last they gathered together and got it over. Respects were paid to Atlanta, who took out her remaining frustrations out on Archie as they sparred, which got him happy. Theresa and Jay worked things out yet again, Odie was relieved to not have any more rants thrown his way, and Herry's mood soared with the rest of them. Neil, to make things right in his world, took a full hour out of his day to get someone to notice his new shampoo. Finally Herry, after a few hints ("My shampoo is _new_. Isn't it _nice_?" "... Uh... yeah. Very nice."), Neil was happy, and called it the 'Day Feelings were Mended'.

Thursday was called the 'Day Nothing Happened', Friday was called the 'Day Theresa Bought Shoes and Everyone Noticed _Them_', and Saturday was the 'Day Cronus Tried to Kill Us with Ugly Goat-Dog-Girl Things' ("For the last time, Neil, there's nothing about lamia that resemble goats _or_ dogs." "Oh, Odie, I don't care! They're _disgusting_.")

Sunday was undoubtedly the 'Day Archie Didn't Shut his Fat Mouth'.

It had started normal enough. By three in the afternoon, Neil was about ready to call this the 'Day Nothing Happened Again', but it was when he, Archie, Atlanta, and Herry were sitting idly around the TV watching whoknewwhat that things began to take a turn for the worst. He supposed it was because of the overly zealous action scenes reminded Archie of yesterday's fight that he decided to say anything at all. Or maybe it was just because Herry kept saying things like, "Yeah, right! I did something _way_ cooler than that yesterday!" and "Neil, you remember when I... Oh, yeah, you weren't there," and "Geez, Neil. You weren't there when I did _that_ either? You missed the whole fight!". At any rate, Archie decided was about time to break the gentle peace that had been growing between them.

"Neil," he said. "You don't really do much in our fights against Cronus, do you?"

The action scenes were taking a toll on Neil's mind. It was trudging so slowly, he couldn't even fathom a deeper meaning behind Archie's words. So he quickly replied, "Sure, I do. I work from the sidelines."

"Yeah?" Archie said, with a touch more enthusiasm. "Like what?"

"Guys, keep it down," Atlanta cut in. "I'm trying to watch."

Archie was quiet for a few minutes, but, like clockwork, brought it up again. "So, Neil, what do you do when we're all fighting?"

"Hmm?" Sprawled out on the couch with arm dangling off the side wasn't exactly his 'thinking position'. He sighed, shrugged, and said, "I don't know. Stuff. I fight sometimes. I guess I just do whatever needs to be done when you guys aren't there to do it... or something."

"Ah," said Archie. "I see."

Silence.

"And by that you mean... ?"

"Uh... If someone's hurt, I guess I'll be the one looking after them."

And then Herry opened his mouth. "Yeah, right!"

Whether he was commenting on the topic at hand or the movie didn't matter. Archie took it as a point for his side, and asked, "When have you ever looked after us?"

"Lots of times," Neil idly responded. "Did you want an actual number?"

"No, it's cool."

More silence.

"So, if you had to... I don't know... give everyone a job - a role, if you will - for the team, what would... mine be?"

Neil sighed again. "Maybe... a fighter-guy?"

"A 'fighter-guy'? You can't do any better than that?"

"Archie, I don't _know_ -"

"Come on," Archie coaxed. "Just try."

"Why? What's it matter?"

"It doesn't. Just tell me what I am to the team."

"I don't know. Some kind of warrior person. Happy?"

"Okay, I'm the warrior of the team." Archie nodded. He and Atlanta were on the floor, Herry having taken up the last seat. He didn't look comfortable, which might have contributed to the desire to take Neil on - who could have been a bit less obvious about how much better the couch was on his feet. "And - uh... what would you call Atlanta?"

"... She's... She does a lot of hunting stuff. The hunter-girl, I guess."

"So, if we were all stranded in the middle of a forest, she could find us some food and cook it and still be able to help fight?"

"Yeah. Sure. Whatever."

"_Guys_," Atlanta said. "Keep it down."

"And Herry?"

"What's up?"

"No, not you, Herry. Neil, what would Herry be to the team?"

Neil rolled his eyes, and, as though it was the most agonisingly taxing chore on the face of the planet, raised his head to look over at the purple-headed teen. "Is there a point to all this?" he asked, his mind working just enough to suspect something.

"No, no," Archie said. "I'm just asking."

"Oh. Okay." Suspicion dead. A-OK, Captain Neil. His head plopped back onto the couch. "Then... He'd be the strong guy. The muscle, I guess."

Archie left it at that for a while, and so Neil turned his attention back to the TV and ever-so-fascinating way the screen reflected the window. Really, it was just art the way the light bounced off its glossy surface. If he squinted, he could see the actual ray shoot through the room and ricochet, dust fluttering in and out of the beam like tiny stars. There was a beauty in it, and as he watched the dust dance, he felt a wonderful calm flow through him. He was relaxed and at one with the dust. He _was_ the dust. The dust was him. They were all connected, and all bound to the same meaning of life, which was so clear to him now. The entire meaning of anyone's existence was -

"And you?"

Stupid Archie and his stupid fat mouth, breaking into his thoughts just as he was about to reach enlightenment. Neil raised his head again. "What?"

"You. What would you be? What's your role?"

"_Archie_ - "

"Just answer the question, Neil."

"Oh, just shut up, Archie."

"_Both_ of you shut up," Atlanta snapped. "I'm trying to watch this thing, okay? I can't do that if you keep talking over the dialogue."

Archie snorted. "What dialogue? They're just shooting each other."

"Yeah, but they're also shooting _witty_ _banter_." Atlanta frowned. "Just be quiet."

Two minutes.

Three minutes.

Four...

"I'd say you're the filler of the team," Archie said.

This caught Neil completely off guard, and all of a sudden his mind was a whirlwind of activity. "What? Why'd you say that?"

Atlanta, who seemed to have been paying a bit of attention after all, added, "Yeah, Arch. That sounded kind of mean."

Archie shrugged. "I wasn't trying to be mean. I was just saying the facts. Neil doesn't _do_ anything. He just... sits there, or cowers in a corner, or watches from a distance, or gets himself in trouble. I mean, yeah, there was this _one_ time he got lucky with leading some ants around, but - come on. How hard was that?"

"Hey!" Neil cried. "I didn't see any ants following _you_."

"No, but I didn't see you fighting them in the first place either." Archie started counting off his fingers. "_Or_ the kraken, _or_ the Scylla, _or_ the Gorgons, _or_ the Minotaurs, _or_ the -"

"Okay, okay!" Neil protested. "So I don't like getting my hands dirty. I still help out. I mean, if it wasn't for me, you guys would have never found Medusa, or you would have found her and one of you would've gotten turned into a pigeon-post."

"Yeah, but you pranced around all happy about it for _weeks_," Archie said. "Why? Because it was the first time you've ever done anything."

"Well, I _never_ -"

"What about the time Medea came and tried to kill us? We tried contacting you for help, and you couldn't even answer your PMR right!" Archie pointed at him. "Face it, Neil. You're just a filler. The only reason you're even _on_ this team is because we needed a seventh member."

"Ex_cuse_ me?" Neil sat up, looking quite horrified at the accusations. "I'm _on_ this team because I'm the descendant of Narcissus!"

With a roll of his eyes, Archie replied, "Yeah, because he's such a great hero. 'Look at me, I'm pretty! Hey, look, a pond! Let's look in it... Oh, wow, I'm so in love I can't even remember that it's my own reflection! Just look at those looks! Guess I'm just gonna have to _die_ here because I'm just too in love with myself to leave.'"

"Oh, yeah?" Neil spat out. "What about _your_ guy? Achilles? Gets hit in the heel and he _dies_ from that?"

"There's some major arteries down there, Neil," Archie said. "And anyway, you're forgetting the fact that he killed, like, _everyone_ that tried to fight him, and that he was _invincible_."

"Except for his heel!"

"Give it up, Neil, and just admit it. You're a filler on this team. You're just the seventh member, and that's that."

Neil gasped in horror just as Odie walked in. "Hey, guys," the newcomer greeted. "What's going on?"

No sooner had this been said than Neil flung himself from his seat and stomped towards the room's exit. "Your _friend_," he jabbed a finger towards Archie, "says he's _happy_ being related to a _mass murderer_." And _stomp - stomp - stomp_, the blond marched out. Seconds later, the fierce cutting sound of a door being whipped shut echoed through the halls.

Odie looked confused. "So... _what's_ happening?"

Herry finally pried his eyes away from the TV, just long enough to ask, "What's this about potatoes?"

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**D/N:** This is a very special note for all those who are kind enough to review (for once, I'm not counting reviews, I'm counting hits.). Understandably, I'm going to be putting my own special touch into each of the characters (i.e.: see above.) but I'm trying to do it by paying as much tribute to the original personalities. In other words, **I'm trying to be in-character with everyone**. So I need help. If you see anything **OOC, tell me**, and I'll try to fix it. (The bold's for people who just skim.) I ask that **everyone do this** before reviewing. It's quite simple. Just **write IC** - for 'in-character' - and then **rank** me from **1 - 10**. (i.e.: IC - 8.) And then just leave your little comments, questions, requests, flames... whatever. Also, if there's anything in your heart that's breaking into a thousand pieces because "OMGEE, why are Atlanta and Archie making out right _now_?" then... well, they're not going to be making out for the whole time, but I can drop a few more hints at closeness or something. Too much Jay and Theresa? Meh. I don't like them. Break-up time. Want a little slashy-slashy? Let me know. (Uhmm... I'm only offering this if you ask for Neil/Herry... It won't be anything big one way or another, but it's the only thing I'm willing to ship at the moment.) Anyway... Yeah... Updating... I can't guarantee much. It'll be fast in the beginning, and then it'll get... sloooooow... Sorry. My _Of Dogs and Men_ readers lived through it. You can, too. (Tu veux, aussi.)


	2. A Visit and Resolution

**D/N:** So. I've updated already. I've surprised myself. Anyway, it's shorter than yesterday, which makes me a bit sad, but happy in the sense that I can still get something up tomorrow. (Hooray! 20 hits! Go me!)

Black Sheen: YES! Someone thinks I'm doing a good job! Thanks so much, and I'm happy you're finding everyone in character. Hopefully it holds true with this chapter as well. Haha, yeah, I'm a pretty big supporter of AxA, too, even if I can't really... stand... either... As for JxT, don't worry. The two of them scare me, and I doubt I'll be giving them any more focus than is truly necessary. And I know the JxT stories you're talking about. I've read some of those. I went to bed crying. It was a sad day. Anyway, anything really romantic's going to be happening a bit later when there's more opportunity to stick it in, but I'll be happy to stick in a couple of gratuitous AxA scenes in. (Yay! Someone else supports NxH, too! Or... doesn't hate it, which is good enough for me!)

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"No, no, girls. You've got the mirror all wrong. You've got to angle it so it reflects my image onto _that_ mirror, so _that_ mirror can reflect it to _that_ mirror and that one can reflect it to the fourth."

"We're sorry, goddess Aphrodite," one of the nymphs grunted, as the trio of maidens struggled to move the mirror into position. "It's just... well... Couldn't you have asked for a _smaller_ mirror? I don't think this will hang on the wall very well."

Aphrodite gave a gentle 'tut-tut', shaking her head. "You girls will just never understand unless it's broken down completely. Ask for a smaller mirror? Is that the solution to everything? To ask for something _less_ grand than what you truly deserve?"

"No, goddess Aphrodite," the nymph replied. She was the only one able to spare a breath to speak. The other two had turned a bit blue in the face, their faces crunched together in concentration and effort as they kept the mirror from crashing to the ground. Twice they had almost dropped it, and, as punishment, Aphrodite made them hold it in the air for five minutes. The nymphs looked about ready to collapse.

"Suppose Zeus had asked for smaller lightening bolts to be made because the giants were too tired to make the ones he wanted," Aphrodite went on. "Do you think he would have been able to hold back Cronus and the Titans as they came for us? Suppose Poseidon had asked for a smaller sea because his servants thought it too large to maintain. Do you think he would have been half the god he is now?"

"No, goddess," the nymph puffed. "It's just -"

"Ah-ah-ah!" Aphrodite wagged a finger. "No more excuses. Just get it done, please."

"Yes, goddess Aphrodite," the nymph wheezed, and the three went back to their epic struggle of meeting their mistress' demands.

Neil was busying himself by flipping through the magazines that lay strewn about the room, half-listening as he lounged in the newly made, luxurious seats Aphrodite had ordered. The whole room was getting a make-over to welcome her newest fascination with sea green and sky blue, and though Neil made a mental note to complain about some of the hideous clashes of style that were sprouting everywhere, he was more interested in what Aphrodite had to say about Archie's comments. It was about time _someone_ started to console him. He'd been locked away in his room for the past three hours and no one had come to check if he was alright. What was the point of barricading the door with his dresser if no one was going to get in? There _wasn't_ one, of course, so he'd stomped out of the dorms to visit Aphrodite, who was busy with giving her nymphs impossible instructions and changing them minutes later.

"It's amazing how elegantly you speak when you're trying to get your way," Neil said. Bored with the magazine at last, he pushed it to the side and stared up at his mentor expectantly. "So, what do you think?"

"I think they're going to break my mirror," Aphrodite said. "Look at them! Do you have any idea how long it took for me to get Hephaestus to stop tinkering with his little trucks and bombs long enough to get me an anniversary present?" She stopped midway through her next word, catching herself. "Oh... You mean with the whole Archie thing?"

"Yeah," Neil said. "I mean, can you believe that? You remember Medusa? _I_ was the one who stopped her in the first place. Without me, she'd probably still be running around. And he has the nerve to say _I_ wasn't helping to fight the _ants_?" He frowned. "I remember the others running away because there were too many. And without me to grab that collar, Odie would have never been able to break Cronus' control over them."

"I guess you're right," Aphrodite replied, without any real conviction. Then she squealed at her nymphs, "_Watch_ it! I just had those walls painted!"

"We're sorry, goddess Aphrodite."

"Just be careful, okay? I'm trying to redecorate, not tear the place down." She rolled her eyes and turned back to Neil, who stared right back, waiting. "What?"

"And?"

"And _what_?"

"You said I was right," Neil prompted. "What else?"

"Well, I don't know," the goddess replied. "Archie kind of has a point, even if he was being rude about it."

Neil sat up, horrified. "You _agree_ with him?"

Aphrodite giggled. "Oh, come on, Neil." She poked his nose. "I don't mean it like that. Sure, you get into the most trouble out of anyone else, and sure, you don't actually help with fighting, but that's _expected_ of you."

"Why?" Neil demanded. "Because I'm just a filler? Is that it?"

"Of course not," she said, breezily. "You're _pretty_. Pretty people can't be expected to get their hands dirty, and it's only natural that we're the ones targeted in any situation." She giggled again. "I mean, remember that time you went off with Echo and Cronus almost destroyed the others?"

"That wasn't my fault," Neil said. "That was Echo's! I didn't _ask_ to be kidnapped and talked to death by that... psycho girl, _which _I don't seem to remember receving a apology for."

"Yes, but the only reason she went after you was because you were so _gorgeous_," Aphrodite said. "Look at those eyes! The only time I've seen eyes better than those was when I looked in the mirror. Of course she went after you. And those Stimpy-flying birds? Remember how they just ignored the others and just beelined it?" She pinched his cheek, and cooed, "It's because you're just so adorable. They couldn't help themselves."

"So," Neil said, slowly working it out in his mind. "You're saying the only reason I'm not more of a use to the team is because... I look too good?"

"Oh, sweetie," Aphrodite said. She took his hand in hers and patted it. "I never said you weren't any use to the team. They need you. Without you, the power of seven would be lost, and they wouldn't stand a chance!"

"So I _am_ a filler!" Neil wailed.

"I didn't mean -"

"Yes, you _did_," he cried, jumping out of his seat. "That's exactly what you meant! You're just the same as Archie! No one believes that I'm anything other than the stupid seventh person on this stupid team, who just sits around and bats his eyelashes -"

"Really _gorgeous_ eyelashes," Aphrodite put in. "Very plump and luxurious! What's your secret?"

"See? _See?_" Neil was in hysterics now, flailing his arms. "The only reason anyone keeps me around is because they _have_ to and because they only want... they only _want_... my beauty secrets!" He burst into tears, and, roaring with grief and pointing out each flaw in the room in retaliation, stormed out.

"Neil!" Aphrodite shouted after him. "Neil, come back! I didn't catch all of that! What was that about my curtains? What's wrong with my rug?"

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He was utterly alone in this world. No one thought he was worth anything. He may as well go home and bury himself in work. That was the only place everyone agreed he fit in. There, he was perfect; a flawless embodiment of beauty and sophistication and a god to all those around him. When he was in front of the camera, he was in charge. Everyone _else_ was a useless lump, breathing _his_ air. But he couldn't just leave and never come back. Though he hated the thought of it being his only purpose, he was needed to round out the team and bring them to their complete number, otherwise Cronus would take over. He couldn't let that happen. Cronus was so... _tacky_, and he'd probably force that tackiness onto the rest of the world. If he ruled, there'd be mismanaged streaks of white in everyone's hair, out-of-date suits on everyone, and - oh God, maybe even only _one_ style of shoes: those _heinous_ loafers he always wore!

For the safety of the world from Cronus' inevitable murder of the fashion era, he had to stay, even if he continued to go unappreciated. Still... it wasn't like he couldn't _try_ to do more. Maybe he could learn to use some kind of weapon, or maybe he could find a way to improve his powers over luck! Wouldn't that be amazing? He'd be unstoppable! He could use jinxes to single-handedly stop Cronus in his tracks, use his luck to make it all the way to the top of something other than the modelling industry, and there'd be no way Archie could ever say he was useless again.

It was the perfect plan, and it was settled. He'd figure out a way to beef up his powers a bit. It couldn't be that hard. Jay didn't really have anything spectacular going for him, but after a few months, he got really good with that whole sword throwing thing. And Theresa! When she first came, she could barely see into the next hour. Now she was pulling off mind-control and using a whole mess of crazy powers. Of course he could do it.

Thinking of Theresa got him wondering if he should be going to see Persephone to help him with all this. Sure, he was good, and maybe he'd be able to use his luck to improve his luck, but that could take... twenty years. And by then he'd be... _old!_ He needed instant results. Yes, Persephone was a good idea. He'd go pay her a visit, and use whatever shards of favourable chance he still had up his sleeve to ensure that she'd be in a good mood.

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**D/N:** Short'n'sweet. Enjoy. Again, please, **rank** my in-character-ness from **1-10**. It really does help, people. I'm actually not sure I did too well with it today...


	3. If All Else Fails, Cry

**D/N:** Considerably longer than yesterday's, I hope. Enjoy!

Black Sheen: I'm so glad it's someone honest who's willing to tell me when I start to suck that reviewing. You've made me very happy, and I love long reviews, so don't worry about that. I can't say I know first-hand what it's like to be ignored - all I have is an older brother who's away in university, so I've been given my fair share of attention, but I'm glad that I was able to give you something to relate to. And yeah, it's doubly painful when it's someone divine and supposed to be in charge of your care. Go authoritative figures. It's great that you like NxH, too! Now I've got blessings to go ahead and add some more of that in. :D

SomethingTree: Yeah, Aphrodite would almost always be on Neil's side, but that'd just make things too easy for him, wouldn't it? I've never heard of Ficwad... Maybe I'll go check it out and see what you mean. Don't worry about rambling. I _love_ rambling. It gives me joy-joy feelings of happiness... or something. Anyway, hopefully I meet your standards for NxH. There's not going to be much of it in the earlier chapters, just quick hints and tiny mentions (the same goes for AxA and... ugh... JxT), but it's a-comin'. French, you say? I can sort of read French! Ooh, something new for me to chew on!

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This wasn't going as well as Neil had hoped. Not that he had expected much, of course. Persephone was unpredictable, a real tribute to those living with massive mood swings or full out schizophrenia, but she'd always given them a helping hand whenever it was an emergency. Apparently, however, Persephone didn't seem to think his problem was as severe as he did. No, she was taking it far too lightly, hardly paying him any attention as she puttered about, watering her precious petunias. Neil bet that if it was _Theresa_ who came in all hurt and upset because of something Archie said, Persephone would be after that boy so fast...

"I'm sorry, Neil," the goddess said. "But I can't help you."

Stupid Persephone, saying it like she was ordering coffee... or whatever it was the gods drank. _Did_ they drink coffee? He thought he saw Hera drinking tea, once, but it might have - no, stay focused! He wasn't curious. He was _angry_. No one was listening to him, and no one seemed to be on his side. Not even Aphrodite, who'd stood by his side as he raved for hours about the dodo bird having once been a dinosaur (This was a very common mistake, he was sure. They all lived in the same time period.). How hard was it to humour someone? Just a quiet "Archie's an idiot" would make all the difference, but no, they just listened to him rant half-heartedly and then went back to talking about their oh-so-_amazing_ flowers. His mood was getting worse by the second, and if things didn't start changing soon, Persephone's place in his heart would be moved somewhere between Aphrodite and that _stupid_ team-mate of his.

"Why not?" Neil asked, his arms crossed. "You help Theresa."

"Theresa's my student," Persephone told him. "She was assigned to my care to develop her psychic ability."

"So, just because Hera didn't officially tell you to, you won't help me?" Neil snorted. "I thought you were compassionate!"

"I _am_, Neil," Persephone replied. She had said this as she pulled weeds out of her garden. What a beautiful sentiment. "But I'm simply not trained to help anyone of your talents. I focus on training those of clairvoyance, not chance."

"You say that like it's pathetic."

She shook her head. "I say it like it's something too wild to be nurtured in a style I'm accustomed to using."

"Then break out of that style, 'Phone," Neil urged. "Think outside the box! I mean, come on - times are changing, and you've got to keep up. Let's broaden that horizon!"

"I can't help you."

"But why _not_?" Neil moaned. "How different is Theresa's powers from mine? Huh? She messes around with minds, I mess around with luck... It's all the same, isn't it?"

"No. Not remotely alike." Persephone stood, brushing the soil off her dress as she turned to face him at last. "You see, Neil, Theresa's powers work in patterns and triggers. If she comes across a specific event or mind, she can use her abilities, and eventually she'll be able to recognise those events and her powers will grow. It's quite a lot like... working out. If you use the same machines each time you train, such as treadmills, your endurance and leg muscles will be strengthened. But this only works from a very specific routine. If you only go to train once a month, and each time you use a different machine, the chances of your muscles growing are far smaller. Do you understand?"

"Sure," Neil said. "So what are my powers like?"

"I just explained that."

"Did you?" he said. "Sorry, I guess I wasn't paying that much attention. Could you repeat that?"

"Neil, I can't help, okay?" Persephone said, her voice rising. "You just can't train luck. You need consistency, which you don't have."

"But it _is_ consistent," Neil insisted. "I win coin tosses all the time." The look on Persephone's face suggested that wasn't quite what she meant. So, he switched to a new idea. "What about Narcissus?"

"What about him?"

"Well, he had power over luck too, right?" Neil said. "He must know how to use it properly. Why can't we ask him?"

Persephone sighed. "_Because_, Neil, he's dead."

"So? You're the wife of the god of dead guys! Come on, 'Phone," Neil begged. He grabbed her hand, forcing her to stop and look him in the eye. "I know you can pull a few strings. You're too smart to not be able to. And so _pretty!_ Just let me ask him a couple of questions, okay?"

"No, _not_ okay," Persephone said, trying to wrench her hand away. She managed it in the end, but she had to blink several times before she was able to break his gaze. "Didn't Aphrodite explain to you how Narcissus died?"

"Yeah," Neil said. "He was so beautiful he looked in a mirror and fell in love with himself, and then he died because he couldn't leave."

"Exactly," Persephone said. She gestured to a lone blossom in a large, ornate vase, perched onto a short table near the centre of the room. "Do you know what that is?"

"Uh... a flower?"

"Not just any flower," she replied, striding towards it in graceful steps. "It's the Narcissus."

"You turned him into a _flower_?" Neil cried. "Oh, Persephone, how am I supposed to ask him anything _now_? You're so short-sighted!"

"Not _Narcissus_, Neil," Persephone snapped. She stopped to take a deep breath, letting it out in a loud puff. "It's _the_ Narcissus. It's said to have sprung from the body of the original Narcissus after he passed away. And _after_," she added, swiftly cutting Neil off, "_after_ his soul went to join the others in rest. Do you see the way its head is angled? The way it's turned to the ground?"

"Uh-huh." How disappointing. Narcissus was supposed to be a vision of absolute beauty, but his flower just looked like a pathetic blob of white unable to hold itself upright. Blue would have been a much nicer colour, and black far more dramatic.

She rested a gentle finger on the flower's stem, and it shivered slightly under her touch. "It's because even after death and even after his soul had gone on, his body remained forever towards the pond. There he is, still staring into his reflection, always longing to touch the face in the water but never able to do so."

"... And?"

"_And_," she said, frowning at the lacking response to the tale, "this is exactly why you can't see the _real_ Narcissus. It's inevitable that you'll fall in love with him - you should see the crowd of admirers around his home - but you look enough like him that he'll fall in love with you right back. We'll never get you away from him, and that'll leave us open to an attack from Cronus."

"Okay," Neil said. "So I won't _see_ him. Can't I call him on the phone or something?"

"His voice is enough to eternally draw you to him." Persephone looked at him sternly. "I _mean_ it, Neil. No seeing Narcissus. You'll waste away just like he did, because the dead are not allowed to come up here, and there's no food down there."

"So _you_ ask him."

"Me?" Persephone shook her head. "Out of the question. I may be divine, but I'm just as susceptible to his charm as anyone, though perhaps a touch less. Even Artemis, even _Hestia_, has fallen victim to him on several occasions. Why, the only one who stands a remote chance against Narcissus would be... well, Achilles, and he's not easy to get to."

"Why not?" Neil asked.

"Because Achilles has insisted on continuing the Trojan war down in the underworld until he wins," she explained. "He's still quite upset over his death, and so he remains fighting until he receives the glow of victory. Once he gets it, he goes through the war all over again." She shrugged. "It keeps him entertained. Anyway, for anyone to make their way through the battle and reach Achilles is an utterly impossible task."

"But there has to be _some_ -"

"Impossible!" Persephone narrowed her eyes. "Now, promise me you won't do anything as foolish as communicate with Narcissus. He's a bit... unstable after the loss of his only love."

"Yeah, okay."

"Promise, Neil."

"Alright. I promise."

"Good boy," Persephone said. "Now, you run along and try to talk things out with Archie."

Neil sighed and hung his head, realising he wasn't about to get any more help out of her. "Yes, Miss Persephone."

No sooner had he left the goddess' room than he came across Hercules(1), strolling happily down the halls of the gods' hideaway. Neil couldn't help but let his lip curl a little in disgust. Hercules was just so... unkempt. He was fat, bulging out of his boxers - which he refused to cover with pants for some reason - and was both hair and balding at the same time. More than once Neil had to keep himself from jumping at the demi-god with a comb. But Hercules was pleasant enough when it wasn't left up to looks, and so the two had a relatively friendly relationship, even if Hercules did deem it necessary to treat him as though he was built like Herry. Now Hercules caught sight of him, waved and smiled brightly, but as he grew closer and spied the crestfallen look on the face of the dear blond, the sunny expresion quickly became a frown.

"Neil," Hercules said. "What's up?"

"Archie's a jerk," Neil replied. "Aphrodite's being an airhead and Miss Persephone is absolutely no help at all. It's a very tragic day in the life of Neil."

"Oh, yeah?" the other said, seemingly interested. "What's up?"

It later struck Neil as kind of odd to think that the exact same question managed to merit two different answers, but at the time he couldn't care less. He burst into a lengthy explanation of Archie and his fat mouth and everything else that had followed, and Hercules stood listening, silent but nodding along at the proper intervals, the first person to actually take his side in the matter.

"That wasn't fair of Archie," Hercules said when Neil ran out of breath. "But he's always been a fireball. You can't take the things he says too personally."

"I can't help it," Neil said. "It just gets under my skin. And now I'm trying to figure out how to get my powers stronger and no one's bothering to even _think_ about helping me out."

"Well, I'll help you," Hercules said. "Do you know what to do?"

"Not really," Neil admitted. "I mean, I came up with the idea to talk to Narcissus, but Persephone said -"

"No!"

"Right. Exactly."

"Neil, you can't talk to Narcissus," Hercules said. "If _anyone_ shouldn't be talking to their ancestor, it's you. You know when he died, he turned into -"

"A flower. Yeah, I know." Neil sighed. "I mean, _I_ don't have to talk to him. Persephone already told me I couldn't go because I'd fall, like, _madly_ in love with him and never leave."

"Yeah," Hercules murmured. "I can't say I'd blame you. Me and Narry... Unseparable. I can't say much, what with you being a kid and all that, but I had some great times with that ancestor of yours, you know that?"

"Uh... No. I don't. And I don't want to." Wow. That was almost as awkward as hearing how his parents... well. "Anyway, _I_ don't need to go. I just need someone to give him a message or something."

"Ha! Fat chance," Hercules said. "The only one who was able to look Narcissus in the eye and not start drowning in drool was Achilles. That guy was immune to _everything_."

"That's what Persephone said," Neil replied. "But she also said that that was out of the question because Achilles was 'utterly impossible' to get to."

Hercules hummed. "Well... He's not... you know... _utterly_ impossible to get to."

"Yes, he is," Neil said. "He's surrounded by this stupid war that he died in, and he's always doing it over and over again because that keeps him amused or something. No one can get to him."

"Well... yeah, most can't... but - I mean... I could do it."

"... You could?"

"Sure!" Hercules exclaimed. "I ripped Cerberus from the gates of Hades and brought him back again. I think I can manage running across a battlefield. I was in it, once upon a time."

Neil's face lit up. "So you'll ask Achilles to ask Narcissus how to use my powers?"

"Well... no. I could, but... no."

And now his face fell. "Why not?"

"Well, I just... I've got a lot of work to do."

"Oh, _really_?" Neil put his hands on his hips. "Like _what_?"

"Uh... Godly stuff. Things you wouldn't be interested in." Hercules shrugged. "Anyway, I haven't talked to Achilles for a long time, and _he's_ always pretty busy with the Trojan war, too. Sorry, Neil. I wish I could help, but I can't." He pat Neil on the shoulder. "Good luck." And he started to walk away.

Neil's jaw dropped. _He_ was going to leave him high and dry too? Hercules wasn't busy - he just wanted to lounge around and eat chicken and trade terrible jokes with Hephestus, the lazy jerk. What was this world _coming_ to? Was _everyone's _place in his heart going to be shoved to the farthest corners? First Archie, then Aphrodite, then... Wait a minute... _Narry_? Was he _serious_? If Narcissus was anything like Neil, then super strength or no super strength, Hercules would be out cold for calling him such a stupid name. But still, Neil couldn't deny that that was a definite show of affection. Maybe... just maybe, if he played his cards right...

"Wha - _Neil_!"

"Oh, _Hercules_," Neil half-sang, half-sobbed. Tears streamed down his face, seeping into the demi-god's shirt as he clung tightly to it. "I'm just so alone in all of this! I would've thought _you_ of all people would have been willing to help me!"

"Neil," Hercules said, completely flabbergasted. "What are you doing?"

"I'm wallowing in the depths of despair!" Neil wailed. "How could you just abandon me at a time like this?"

"Wha... _wha_...?"

"You're the only one strong enough to make it to Achilles, and he's the only one who's able to talk to Narcissus, and you're just leaving me to fend for myself!" Neil paused to let out a great, hiccupping sob. "I mean, it's almost like you _want_ me to hold the team back."

"No, of course not," Hercules said, desperately trying to calm the heart-broken teen. "I just... Well, I don't think Achilles would be _willing_ to go see Narcissus."

"Oh, you could talk to him!" Neil said. "You could make him take a break from his silly war for just a little while and help a poor guy out."

"Neil..." haphazard

"Hercules, please," Neil said, looking up at him with large, watery eyes. "If not for me, then do it for... for _Narry_."

That did it. Hercules let out a mumbled word of confusion and stepped back. Finally, after a few minutes of inward deliberation (Neil was surprised it didn't take longer) gave a sharp nod and pulled Neil into a fierce, bone-crushing hug. "Alright," he said. "I'll do it, you poor kid. I won't let you down." With that, he released Neil, who immediately fell to the ground. A quick pull - which nearly ripped Neil's arm off - and Hercules was off, leaving Neil pat himself on the back for a job well done with the limb that still worked.

"Now," Neil said to himself, "the only thing left to do is take a shower and get rid of this smell..."

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(1) - I'm well aware that Hercules is his Roman name. I just prefer the sound of 'Hercules' to 'Heracles'.

**D/N:** I'm... okay with how this chapter turned out. Not pleased, certainly not ecstatic, but I'm not too compelled to re-write this. A bit off character in my books, but hopefully it's the end of haphazard writing. It's just something about Persephone in particular I just can't quite... nail. And hey - anyone else notice that Neil's favourite word is officially 'stupid'? XD Just count how many times I've made him say it in the fic so far. Once again, I ask that I'm **rank**ed from **1-10** for my in-character-ness. Thanks a bunch, everyone.

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	4. The Day of Almost Waste

**D/N:** So... this chapter... a bit of friendship fluff at the end (despite my best efforts to _avoid_ that) but hopefully nothing too unbearable. Man, it's hard to keep them in character when I make them all... 'Awwwww...' and stuff. Let's pray I did a good job. O.o Anyway, short chapter. Again. On a more uplifting note, there's at least 20 people reading this. Hooray for me! Cheetos for all!

Black Sheen: Hopefully you've seen enough of the show to be able to answer the Persephone question on your own. No. She wouldn't. Neil would have been flung from the room as she burst into one of her crazy fits. But I decided to give her a break this time. Let's just chalk it up to anger management classes or a really, _really_ good mood - that's what Neil was hoping for, right? As for the little Hercules and Neil friendship thing... Well, I supposed I leaned into it a bit much, but I'm going from the fact that in the episode with Medusa and the Gorgons, aside Aphrodite, Hercules was the only one willing to listen after so long. Everyone just kind of... yeah. And I can too write romance! ... I just don't want to... ... Yes... That's my reason...

Blue-Fire310: I'm so flattered you took time away from vigorously studying tests that will ultimately decide your course in life to read my story:D It gives me great joy to think that someone's actually able to read this and still enjoy it despite having such little experience with the actual show. As for the personalities... Well, I can't take credit for making them. I will, however, take full credit for taking them off-screen and sticking them onto Fanfiction. Hopefully, if you manage to catch the show one day, you'll have a wee bit more familiarity with the characters, but for now, screenshots bios are fine. And hooray! Another NxH shipper! NOW GET BACK TO STUDYING.

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"Neil, come _on,_" Archie asked. "Just let me in, okay? I'm trying to apologise."

"I've got a dresser crammed up against the door," Neil replied. "Whatever you want to say, just say it and go."

He'd been preparing for this all night. The moment he got in through the door, he'd marched to his dorm in an angry silence, refusing to glance at anyone and going out of his way to storm in front of the TV. That sent a chain reaction flowing through the others. Herry, who'd been watching another of his overly violent shows, started to complain that he couldn't see if Neil was going to sulk in front of the screen all day. This caught Theresa's attention, who drew her phone conversation to a halt and tried to force the story out of Archie, up to this point busy relaxing. He, of course, wasn't about to start setting himself up for a fall, and so the recollection he gave ended up quite watered-down. This caused Atlanta to get involved, and, in one of those contradictory moods, told Theresa a version that had everything except Archie stringing Neil up by his feet and smacking him with a bat. Naturally, the girls ganged up on him, and the very next morning, there was Archie, struggling to get into the door, almost ready to plead out of frustration.

Neil was loving every minute of it.

"Neil!" Archie snapped, pounding on the door. "Just _open_ the door."

"No can do, Arch. _I'm_ surprised I managed to get that thing over there in the first place. We're going to have to hire someone to move it back later." It was wonderful thing, revenge. So wonderful, in fact, that he felt he could just draw this out all day...

"_Neil!_" The door shook again, but closer to the bottom than before. Archie was beginning to kick.

"Geez, Archie," Neil sang back, "you've got to break everything I have? First my ego, and then my door?"

There was a low growl in response. "_No one_ can break _your_ ego, Neil. Just stop being so dramatic and open the door so we can get this over with."

"Oh, I see," Neil said. "You don't even _care_ that you hurt my feelings. You just want to spit out a quick 'Oh, I'm sorry, Neil' so the others will stop bothering you. I'm definitely not letting you in now."

Almost immediately Archie changed his tone. Now it was back to a pleading whine. "Neil, please, just open the door. I really am sorry. I wasn't trying to -"

"You know the rules!" Neil interrupted. "All apologies must be face-to-face in order to receive consideration of acceptance!"

"Well, if you'd open this stupid door, I could do that."

"Archie, if you were _really_ sorry, you'd find another way to get in."

"There _isn't_ another way to get in, Neil!" Archie cried. "The only other hole in this hall is your window, and you're on the second story! What do you expect me to do - climb a ladder?"

"I've got a little rope one I could drop down for you," Neil said. "It's for fires, but I think I could make an exception."

"... You can't be serious."

"Oh, I'm serious."

There was a sudden symphony of punches to the door, each one causing the wood to shake harder than the last. "I am not going to climb a ladder just to apologise to you! _Let me in_, or I'll just leave and you can be angry for the rest of your life."

Silly Archie, thinking he had any talents of persuasion. He was playing with the big boys now, and idle threats like that only worked if one had the upper hand - like Neil. "Gee, Archie," he said, stretching out on the bed. "I don't think Theresa or _Atlanta_ would appreciate such hostility. I might have to tell them that you were too cold-hearted to swallow your pride for just a few minutes to save your friendship with me." A bluff, of course, but it wasn't as if someone like _Archie_ would know that. And as he heard Archie give a final kick to the door and trudge away, Neil let out a quiet laugh, shook his head, and murmured a smug, "Dance, monkey. Dance."

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"I _hate_ you."

Neil smiled at him. "That's really not scoring you any brownies, Archie. Come on - let's see a happy face as you beg for forgiveness."

"I'm _not_ begging," Archie snapped. "I'm just here to say sorry and get on with my life."

"But begging's good for you," Neil said. "It humbles the soul and frees the heart."

"Then why don't _you_ ever beg for forgiveness when _we're_ angry?"

"Because I'm just too darn innocent to have anyone stay mad at me long to require begging."

"Innocent?" Archie spat out, his face flushing a light red. "_Innocent_?_ Look_ at me!"

Neil was looking, and he was pleased. Wonky foot or not, Archie was very good at climbing ladders. He'd done exactly what he'd been told in far less time than he'd expected, and now here the teen was, half his body inside Neil's room, the other half flapping in the breeze. Was Neil good, or was Neil good?

"Stop. Smiling." Archie hissed through clenched teeth. "Can I just apologise and get out of here?"

"Alright, fine," Neil said. "But... on one condition..."

His teeth clenched even tighter. They almost looked as though they were about to shatter. "What condition?"

And with one of the sweetest looks Neil had in his arsenal, the blond looked up and replied, "Sing for me."

"_I am_ _not singing!_" Archie yelled, almost losing his balance. "You are _not_ hurt! You're completely _un_hurt! If you weren't, you wouldn't be asking me to climb ladders and _sing_!" His fingers dug into Neil's windowsill, his knuckles almost white. "You know what? Forget this! I'm not going to act like an idiot just because I was being honest. Yeah, okay, I was a little rude, fine, but _this_ is more than enough to make up for it! I'm out of here. It was a two-second sentence. Get over it already."

"Okay, okay," Neil said. "So I'm enjoying a little more than I should. But I've _told_ you to stop joking about things like that. I'm sensitive about it."

"Oh, whatever."

"See? That's _exactly_ why I put you on this ladder." Neil frowned at him. "I'm the only one on this team who doesn't get the respect he deserves. I fight when I have to. I can't help it if I'm not vicious like you."

"Whatever," Archie repeated. "Look, can we just call it even so I can get out of here? My butt's freezing."

Neil sighed. "Fine. Go."

"_Finally_," Archie muttered, pulling himself out of the window.

Well, that was a waste. All Neil had done was drive the wedge farther in-between them. This led him right back where he started - miserable, sulking, and face down on his bed. _What_ a waste. In fact, today was going to named the 'Day of Waste' after the amount waste they'd wasted. Or... didn't waste. Something like that. He wasn't it the mood to sort it out right now. For the time being, he just wanted to wallow in this fresh batch of melancholy, annoyed at how not having _everyone_ on the team like him caused so much frustration. Even the thought of preening didn't spark his usual interest. How pathetic.

He'd been lying there for a few moments when Archie stuck his back in through the window. "Neil?" he said. "You know I don't hate you. You bother me a lot, more than anyone else, but I don't _hate_ you."

"Wow, Archie," Neil replied. "That's _such_ a consolation."

"... Consolation?"

"I _use_ big words, you know," Neil snapped. "I'm not stupid."

"Yeah, it's just that 'consolation' is so..." Archie stopped himself, then began again with, "Anyway, I _am_ sorry. You know... about yesterday and before that and stuff."

"Fine. You're forgiven."

"Really? Are you just saying that, or am I actually back in your good books?"

Neil rolled his eyes at him. "Yes, you're still in my good books. Just not on the first page. You're closer to the end... possibly on the back cover. Maybe even on a little scrap of paper taped to the back, barely clinging to it and always on the verge of falling off, but you're still in my good books."

"Okay," Archie said. "Well... you're still in mine. We're cool?"

"Yeah," Neil said. "Yeah, we're cool."

"Alright. I'm going to go." Archie lingered for a second longer, as though Neil were about to change his mind and demand a song after all, but took his leave when it looked like he was in the clear.

Fine, alright. Maybe the day wasn't a total waste. That was a bit of progress, wasn't it? Okay, today was re-named to the 'Day of Almost Waste'. His little decision gave him a small spurt of energy, and Neil, in a slightly better mood, was back on track with his whole 'getting stronger' thing. He wasn't going to give anyone else a chance to call _him_ a filler. So, hoping his luck would lend a hand, he began to wait for Hercules to return with good news.

How long _did_ it take to make a round trip to Hades, anyway?

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**D/N:** Anyway, yes, fluffy. Gratuitous fluff for my silent readers who may or may not have been craving it. Ugh... This story really needs a second genre... but I'm just so... against defining this thing again. Maybe I should just switch it to 'General' and be done with it even if... well... it's not cool. Does anyone here actually _read_ General fiction? What kind of genre is that? It's like going to the pharmacy and saying you'll take the _general_ medicine for your _general_ illness. But I digress from whatever it was my point stated. **Rank** from **1-10** if you could! I like knowing how in-character these chapters are. _Especially_ this one.

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	5. Mark it Down as 'Useless'

**D/N:** Yeah... So, I'm not good with Greek. If someone wants to translate my little attempt, go nuts. You're not going to get that great of a result. But I wrote down the intended meaning as well, so hopefully that counts for something. Guys, don't forget to **rate** the in-character-ness (I love typing that, I really do.) when you review. It helps a lot. The method's on the bottom of the first chapter.

Demenior: Aww, thanks! Yeah, I'm a bit sad to see not many are reviewing, but like I said before, I'm looking at hit counts and not review numbers. I'm glad you're liking it so far, and I'm even happier that you appreciate my updating. :D I hope this chapter keeps you happy, too.

SomethingTree: XD That's not something I hear everyday, but at least I'm a good fluff writer in your books. That means something. Archie's not too high on my list of favourite characters, but he's higher up than Jay or Theresa, so I'm willing to give him a bit more credit of being a nice guy. AND DO YOUR HOMEWORK. Procrastination is no one's friend... except mine.

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Γρουσούζης' και 'καλός τύχη' - ίσως ποικιλλώ - απολαμβάνω.

Whatever _that_ meant...

A full week had gone by without the slightest hint of Hercules. During that time, Neil wondered if he was taking so long because he'd joined up with Achilles to fight in the war for a bit and lost track of time, or maybe it was because Persephone was wrong and Achilles was trapped by Narcissus after all, or - and this seemed the most likely - Hercules just forgot what he was supposed to do and was now wandering the Underworld trying to remember. But at last, he returned with a triumphant look upon his face and a great box in his hands. Neil had nearly torn him apart to get it, and the demi-god was still probably on the ground in a daze. Whatever. Neil would apologise later. Right then, he was more interested in finally uncovering the secret to unlock his super-cool, super-strong, totally-awesome powers. The excitement of it all was so strong, in fact, that it hadn't even occurred to him to ask why the box was so light, but the mystery was solved the moment he got it open.

The entire box was filled with bubbles, which shot out like lightening and popped in sharp cracking sounds as they hit his ceiling. Each one was a different colour, and as they popped, they gave off a fruity, fragrant scent that turned his room into... something that smelled like fruit and that people enjoyed smelling. He was delighted with it, absolutely thrilled with the small show, but his elation began to die out as he checked what was left for him inside.

It didn't _look_ very impressive, but Neil had been certain that they held some sort of deep, unfathomable meaning to them that would only make sense if he spent the rest of the day mulling it over. Inside the box was a small, silver coin, pushed up against an even smaller scrap of paper - a fleck of lint, really. But Neil tried to keep optimistic as he went to check them both, even as the little note written on the paper's surface tried to convince him otherwise with its overall uselessness. That note, that key to everything, that door to reveal his great and hidden abilities, that one thing that was going to change his life forever, was the little bit of gibberish he'd been staring at for the last twenty minutes.

Gee. _Thanks_, Narcissus.

The coin itself was really just a flat, metal disc, with a happy face scratched into one side and a sad face into the other. Neil flipped it around a few times, playing with the one part of his luck he knew how to control ("Oh, look. I win the coin toss again. Hooray for me.") before deciding he may as well get to work trying to translate what looked like... four? No, _five_ words of advice he'd been given. Wow. A whole five words. Why, he'd be up all night, feeling worse and worse every second. And the twenty minutes he spent staring at the scrap as though it were about to miraculously change into some kind of almighty manual didn't help, either. No matter he did to try and re-convince himself that, yes, this was going to answer all his questions, it was just a bit of lint with a few nonsense scribbles all over it. How could anyone believe this was going to explain things?

At last, Neil decided to pay a visit to dear Odie, even though the very thought of it sent a shiver of shame down his spine. Here he was, trying to prove how wonderfully independent he was going to be, and his very next method of getting this thing to make sense was to run off to get someone else to do it. Alright, fine. He'd go see Odie. If anyone asked, he hadn't really _become_ independent yet - he was just on the way. Sure, that worked.

He made his way over to the other's room, and just as he readied himself to knock, a tinny voice barked at him, "_Come in_."

In Neil went, almost landing flat on his face as he tripped over a stack of oddly shaped parts. Philosophy nipped at him. Those things on the ground were just as foreign to him as the note, but they all did something when used properly. Maybe the note _would_ explain everything. "Odie," he said, stepping over another pile of flashing whatchamacallits, "You're good with languages, right?"

"The best," Odie said. He was sitting in front of his precious computers, all twelve of them, lit up by the light of the monitors and surrounded by discs, wires, and computer chips of various sizes.

"I need you to translate this for me," Neil said, holding out the scrap of paper. "It's in some crazy language I can't read, so I want you to do it."

Odie looked interested, as he usually did when approached with anything new or unusual. Which was good, because Neil wasn't really up for waiting another week. "Which language?"

"I don't know. Whatever language Narcissus speaks, I guess."

"Narcissus?" Odie asked, taking the piece of lint. "Your ancestor Narcissus? What'd you need to talk to him for?"

"He's the only one who can help me to get stronger," Neil explained. "He's going to train me."

Odie raised an eyebrow. "He's going to train you... with _this_?"

"Yeah, I guess." Neil shrugged. "Maybe it's all I need to know."

"Oookay... I guess he knows what he's doing." With a squeak of his chair, he whipped back around to face his computer and spent the next few minutes tapping on his keyboard, his fingers moving over the keys like some possessed machine. Neil felt almost sick watching how fast things were moving on each of the screens, but Odie finished soon enough. The piece of lint was returned, and a final message blinked at them from the main monitor.

_Error. Translation not found._

"I don't understand," Odie said. "My software is state-of-the-art. I even installed an entire dictionary of ancient Greek specifically for these sorts of situations. What's going on?"

"Maybe you put it in wrong," Neil said.

"No," Odie said, sounding almost offended. "This program's designed to systematically provide the closest variations of the word if the one input is off. With this... there's nothing showing up." He shook his head. "Weird. This _should_ be working."

"Well," Neil said. "Maybe it's the wrong language."

"They _all_ spoke ancient Greek, Neil. They didn't suddenly switch to French to try and trick us."

"What about _today's_ Greek?" Neil asked. "Did you check that?"

The corner of Odie's mouth twitched, and despite his dark skin, a tingle of red grew on his cheeks. "Right. Okay... Just give me another second." Another three minutes of clicking and flashing lights. When he finished for the second time, Odie let out a long sigh and leaned back in his chair. "This was all Narcissus gave you?" he asked.

"And this," Neil said, holding up the small coin.

Odie nodded, but there was a frown on his face. "I hate to break it to you, but I don't think this is enough information for anyone to learn anything." He waved at his monitor. "Unless there's some secret message that only you can understand, you better ask him for something else to work with."

"Why? What's it say?"

"I can't get an _exact_ translation," he told the blond. He looked disappointed. "But the closest meaning is 'Jinx and good luck. May vary. Enjoy.' Mean anything to you?"

"Uh... no?"

"Then you need talk to him again," Odie advised. "Because if this was for me to learn from..." He shook his head, kissed his teeth. "There's only so much I can do, but you're lucky. Maybe you'll figure it out in the end."

Neil looked at the screen, the translation smiling back at him as though it alone knew what Narcissus meant and had no intention of sharing.

Stupid computer.

Stupid translation.

Stupid note.

Stupid coin.

Stupid... box.

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**D/N:** And that's that. Short, hopefully you'll get something longer tomorrow, sorry, deal with it for today. Now, I'm tired, and I'm going to get some sleep. If you could, please **rate** my in-character-ness from **1-10**. I personally think I did okay, but I like to know what you think.


	6. Rallying the Troops

**D/N:** Hmm... Well, I think I should have mentioned earlier that I was planning to take the weekend off... But anyway, here's the next chapter. Enjoy.

Demenoir: Believe me, that .5 gives me more confidence than the 9, because at least I know you're being honest and willing to give criticism. Don't think I don't appreciate that. As for the coin... well, I can't say too much too soon, can I:D ... Yes, that was my pathetic attempt to build suspense.

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"But these couldn't have been _all_ the instructions he gave you," Neil said, struggling to keep up. "There had to have been something else. _Anything_ else."

"I'm sorry, Neil, but that's it." Hercules starting walking a bit faster, the wheels of his cart squealing as they rolled along.

"Then maybe he forgot to give you the rest of it," Neil went on. "Maybe Narcissus called him back and was like, 'Oh, that's right, here's the other half'. So you need to go back and -"

"No can do," Hercules said. "Hera asked me to do a bunch of deliveries. I don't have any time to go back to Hades for the next couple of days."

"There has to be _something_ -"

"Why don't you ask Persephone?" Hercules suggested. "I'm sure she'll go if you ask nicely." He poked one of the boxes in his cart, unwittingly tearing a hole. "I'm going over to give her some stuff now. You up to coming?"

"I think she's seen enough of me for the next little while," Neil said. "Are you _sure_?"

"Sorry, Neil."

This pushed Neil into another fit of sulking. He thought briefly about bursting into tears again, but remembered how long it had taken to get Hercules' crazed sweat glands out of his mind and off his clothes and decided against it. After all, it wasn't going to do much good. Hercules obviously wasn't understanding just how important all this was, and because of that, Neil couldn't rely on him to pull this off. If he wanted this done, he was going to have to do this himself.

Well... maybe not _all_ by himself. Going down to the Underworld with all those... _corpses_... wasn't exactly sending his 'fun-o-meter' off the charts. All those people trapped in one time period and doomed to forever appreciate only _one_ style of fashion... Ew. Retro was only cool when it was on purpose. He couldn't imagine what he'd do if he ran into someone from the 70's. Besides, even if the last time he'd gone down he hadn't been attacked by zombies, Neil had still heard tales from many of the gods about how vicious they could be, and if Hercules wasn't going to help - well, he'd have to settle for the next best thing.

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"Hey," Herry grunted. "Down in front."

"Herry," Neil sang. "How good to see you looking well. Are you having a good day?"

"Movie. Can't see."

Neil ignored him, and remained standing in front of the TV. "Herry, how would you like to accompany me to the Underworld to go see Achilles?"

"Sure. Movie first."

"He's in the middle of a war, though," Neil told him. "So I'm going to need you to fight past a whole bunch of stuff, like soldiers and cannons and swords and stuff."

"Sure. Movie first."

"It's nothing to be worried about," he said. "And Hercules got through it in a week, so maybe if we hurry, we can do it in three days or something. So, you're in?"

"Yeah, yeah, fine. I'll do it after the movie." Herry was craning his neck in every direction he could manage, trying desperately to see past him and watch his precious film. "Could you move, please?"

Finally Neil stepped to the side, and a great glow of relief and peace flooded Herry's face. "Now," Neil said, "if it's going to take a bit of time, we're going to need to pack some food. Of course, with my delicate hands, I can't carry too much, so you'll have to do most of the heavy-lifting. Just think of it as training."

"Yeah, sure," Herry murmured.

"And now that we know how to get past Cerberus, the only real thing we need to look out for is that we don't eat the cakes ourselves and _you_ don't give them to that disgusting creature as treats again."

"Uh-huh."

"The only other things I could see causing a problem is actually getting into the passage to the Underworld," Neil said. He frowned in thought, resting a finger on his chin. "There's no way Persephone would let us go, and I know we can't depend on Hera to take our side, so we'll probably have to ask Theresa or something."

"Yeah."

"I mean," he said, "I don't know if she'll be able to do it if it's mind-controlled or something, but maybe there's an on button Persephone told her about. And we'll probably have to take her with us, just to make sure she doesn't tell Jay anything."

"Yeah."

Neil frowned. "But Jay might get worried if Theresa's not there, and if he gets worried, he'll start looking for her and then tell Hera when he can't find her. And then everyone will figure out what I'm up to! So, I think we might have to take Jay, too. But that might be too many people... Maybe we can get around bringing him."

"Yeah."

"... Herry."

"Yeah."

He gave a gentle snort of disbelief. "Herry, are you listening to me?"

"Yeah."

"... Do you want me to stand in front of the TV again?"

"Yeah."

"Do you want me to shut it off?"

"Yeah."

"Do you want me to rip off your arm and smack you with it?"

"Yeah."

"Do you want me to poke out your eyeballs with matches and then squish them into eyeball just and then make you drink it?"

"Wow, Neil. I never knew you were so vicious."

"Yeah."

After a quick moment of getting over his little heart attack and smoothing his hair back into place, he was able to explain himself. "Oh, don't worry, Theresa. I wasn't _really_ going to do it, even if Herry's being _completely_ rude by ignoring me."

"Yeah," said Herry.

Neil rolled his eyes before turning back to the newcomer. "Anyway, did you want to come with Herry and me on a little adventure?"

Theresa said nothing for several seconds, spending the time studying Neil's face for anything suspicious. At last she said, "You... want to go on an adventure. You."

"That's right."

"_You_. The guy who complained when we told him we were spending the weekend camping."

"Hey," Neil protested. "I had a right in the end. Remember the giants? Remember the attack? Remember the _bear_? Besides, I went, didn't I?"

"Well, yes, eventually," Theresa said. "But only after we said we'd pile our blankets together to give you a mattress."

"Which I graciously accepted, even though it did absolutely nothing to keep me from feeling all those horrible rocks and sticks and grass underneath." Neil smiled at her. "Come on. It'll be fun."

Theresa looked utterly dumbfounded. "Neil, unless you're talking about fighting your way through crazy shoppers at the mall, I can't imagine believe you'd think _any_ adventure is worth the effort."

"Oh, but this is different," Neil assured her. "This is going to benefit me immediately. Instant results are very appealing."

"Where are you planning on going?"

"The Underworld."

"The _Underworld_?" Her eyes grew wide. "Have you completely lost your _mind_? Do you have any idea how dangerous it is down there?"

"It's not that bad," Neil said. "Sure, the atmosphere's a little... dead, but it's going to be worth it in the end. And anyway, you _have_ to come, because you're the only person other than Persephone who's got any chance of opening up that passage. If you don't go, _we_ can't go."

Now she let out an aggravated sigh, unsure of what to say. "What are you going to the Underworld for?"

"I've got to get a message to Narcissus," Neil told her. "And the only way to do that is to get Achilles to tell him, because he's supposed to be the only one who won't fall in love with him. But... he's sort of fighting in the Trojan war."

"... Uh... okay..."

"Yeah, it's weird, isn't it?" Neil said. "And totally obsessive. I mean, he _died_, and now he just keeps fighting that same stupid fight until he wins. But anyway, I'm bringing Herry because I need him to get us to Achilles."

"'We'?" Theresa echoed. "Neil, I just wanted to know _where_ you were going. I never said I _was_ going."

"What? But you have to!"

"Hey, sorry, but I think I've had all the Underworld adventures I can take. I just... I don't like being around the dead. It's unnerving, and it seems so... blasphemous. I can't go back just for the heck of it, and especially if it's just to deliver a note." Theresa shrugged. "Why don't you just ask Hermes to do it for you?"

"No, no, no," Neil said. "Because Hermes will tell Hera, and then Persephone will eventually find out and then I'll get in trouble because she already told me not to talk to Narcissus."

"Well," Theresa said. "Then I'm _definitely_ not going if Persephone said not to. I'm not getting in trouble over something like that, and there's no way I'm going to risk making the only one who knows how to help me train my powers upset."

Neil shook his head, and, placing his hands on her shoulders, said, "Theresa, Narcissus is the only one who can help _me_. If I don't talk to him, I'll never get stronger, and then I'll always hold the team back. You think Cronus isn't going to try and hit us with something harder each time? Sooner or later, he's going to pull out something _really_ bad, and if I'm holding the team back, we won't stand a chance. Theresa, do you _really_ want to hold the team back?"

She chewed on her lip. "Well... I guess not..."

"Great! So, you'll come and open the passage?"

"Ah... I can try. I've seen how Persephone does it, but I've never tried myself."

"That's what I'm for," Neil said. "I'm lucky! You'll do it if I'm there." He looked over at Herry, reached forward and swatted at him. "Herry, go get some food. We've got to start getting packed."

"Movie."

"No. No movie. Get packed."

As soon as Neil shut the TV off, Herry let out a long cry of protest. "I want to watch my movie! What'd you do that for?"

"You need to get food," Neil said. "We're going to the Underworld today."

"Underworld?" Herry wrinkled his nose. "Since when are we going to the Underworld?"

"Why do we need food?" Theresa asked. "Just how long do you plan on staying down there?"

"Just... a day or two. We need to _find_ Achilles, Theresa."

"Couldn't we just ask around?" Theresa said.

"We will," Neil replied. "But it might take a while to actually get to him, and then we've got to wait for him to come back with the message, and a whole bunch of other stuff. It'll be fine. Just trust me."

"... So... _where_ are we going?"

"Just get some food, Herry..."

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**D/N:** Ahaha! So I made Herry a bit movie-crazed. Ah, well. I don't think it's too farfetched. Anyway, this marks the first true appearance of Theresa. Soon, we'll get something with Jay, and then later something solid with Atlanta. Anyway, **rate** the in-character-ness from **1-10**, and I'll see you guys tomorrow.


	7. A Door of Opportunity

**D/N:** I think by now you've begun to notice the predicted slowdown in updates. Ah, well... With any luck, I'll pick up the pace again shortly. Quick chapter.

Demenoir: I'm glad you liked it! Yeah, poor Herry just wanted to watch his movie, and he can't even do that. The world's a cruel place. As for Archie, I'm going to say that every trait of his ancestor is kind of... watered-down after so many generations. He's usually the first one to snap at Neil or criticise or yell or... other stuff, so I take that to mean yes in the sense that Neil can't get away with so many things around him, but completely immune? Not really.

Fanficchic45: I feel horrible for cutting into everyone's school time with this. ... Especially mine... :( I'm going to wind up turning all of you into homeless people.

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"I have no idea how to open this thing."

"Yeah. We can tell."

Two hours. Two _hours_ they'd spent trying to open this stupid thing, and the only thing Neil could positively say was that he'd managed to call down the grace of some god of something, because there was no way _his_ luck was what was keeping Persephone away. So, now they crowded around the passage's entrance, staring uselessly at the still mural of the oracles. Theresa was studying it hardest of all, tapping her foot in consideration as she struggled to come up with something new to try.

"I know she waves her hand," she said. "She kind of waves it... I think it's like this." She proceeded to demonstrate. The passage stayed closed. "Well, maybe not _quite_ like that." She tried a slightly different way. The passage stayed closed. "Or... No, maybe it's got a bit more of a snap in the wrist." She snapped her wrist this time. The passage stayed closed. "Okay. Maybe if I try curving my hand a bit..."

"You know," Herry said, "I don't think it's your hand that's the problem. Doesn't she use magic or something?"

Neil knew things were getting bad if _Herry_ was the one offering suggestions - and they were listening. Theresa tapped her foot a bit more, before saying, "I think I'm going to try and just reach out to them. With my mind, I mean."

"Can you do that?" Herry asked.

"We're about to find out." Theresa took a breath in, her face beginning to grow serious with concentration. "Here goes..."

If Neil and Herry hadn't seen it so often, they would have laughed or called someone. Theresa became deathly silent, staring at the mural with an unheard-of intensity, the mental bond she was trying to create so powerful they could almost see it shimmer in the air. She was stock-still, unblinking, practically holding her breath, and after a few seconds of trying to make her powers awaken the oracles, tiny beads of sweat began to roll down the side of her face. Her teeth began to grind together and her hands started to clench. It was obvious she was pouring everything she had into this one attempt.

And the passage stayed closed.

With a sigh, Theresa stopped. "Well," Neil told her, "_that_ was a waste."

"I don't see you coming up with any ideas," Theresa snapped. "And this is _your_ 'adventure'."

"I could always try breaking it down," Herry offered. "It's just a wall, right? I can knock it over."

"Herry, use your head," Neil said. "If you knock it down, Persephone will know we've been in here. We're trying to make it look like we've been in our dorms all day, or something other than this place." He looked at Theresa. "She must have told you _something_ to open this..."

"Well, gee, I guess she did. I think it was even on that quiz she gave me about getting to place she absolutely _forbade_ us from ever going to." She rolled her eyes. "Silly me for forgetting what it was."

"Yeah," Herry said. "That could have really helped."

Neil shook his head. "Maybe there's some kind of word she says. Or maybe she's got this button stuffed somewhere. Try poking them in the eyes." Theresa looked horrified. "_That's_ where they hide the secret buttons on these things. Come on, T, watch a movie! You're missing out on the greatest source of education, like, _ever_."

"I'm not going to poke the Oracles in the eyes," said Theresa. "It's...blasphemous."

"Oh, you and your blasphemy!" Neil cried. "What's the point of even being here if all you're going to say is we'll be thrown straight to Hell for doing _anything_?"

"I dunno, guys," Herry said. "I think Theresa was on to something with that whole hand-waving."

She shrugged. "You're welcome to give it a try. It's not like it's going to do any harm. Just _don't_ poke them in the eyes. There's obviously no buttons there."

"Of course it's not obvious," Neil said. "They're _hidden_, because they're secret. If they were obvious, we'd be running to the Underworld every week."

"Yes, Neil, because that's how I want to spend my Fridays."

"Sure," he told her. "Why not? I'm sure _one_ of them has something interesting to talk about."

Herry was standing in front of the mural, concentrating even harder than Theresa had been. He was flailing his hand all over the place, and almost smacked their resident psychic in the back of the head. She ducked, fortunately, so Herry had no reason to stop. After a few more seconds, there was a sudden flash of light, and bright, lively colours seeped into the mural. The oracles were up, and giving a blissful sigh, they moved aside the curtain of stone and open the passage at last.

"Herry..." Theresa breathed out. "How'd you do that?"

"Uh... I don't know."

"There's no luck like dumb luck, right Herry?" Neil pat him on the shoulder.

"Yeah! ... Wait, what?"

"Now," Neil told the oracles, "Don't you ladies go telling Persephone we were here, okay? This is a very secret mission we're on."

"You three better be careful," the Oracle of Summer told them. "There's some dangerous things down there."

"We'll be fine. Right, guys?" Theresa frowned at him. Herry wasn't listening. Neil shook his head and looked down the passage again. "Alright. Well... let's go."

**D/N:** Very short. I know. I _really_ believe I could have made this... longer, but my brain's been hit with French. My apologies if it seemed rushed. Hopefully I'll take care of it tomorrow. For now, please **rate** this chapter's **in-character-ness** from **1-10**.


	8. The Day of Disappointment

**D/N:** Sooo... A bit of a wait there. Well, I told you it was coming, but hopefully the next little while will be faster. Hopefully this chapter is better than last chapter, which, in my personal opinion, sucked ass. I also find it kind of funny how I write my responses in alphabetical order, and it's so easy because you all review in alphabetical order. Well, reserve alphabetical, really. The review listing shows oldest to newest, but it still comes out alphabetical. ... I've killed my joke. :(

Blue-Fire310: Hey! Go Spring Break! Welcome back! Where'd you go? And I'm glad you like the story, even if you can't rate the IC. But you've got an excuse, so it's fine.

Demenoir:D I love Herry. I can't help but make him add his two cents. I'm really hoping you're not back from Europe yet (enjoy yourself there!) because there's been a bit of a delay with my updating. But it's here at last, so if you're not back, this'll be waiting, which is always good.

Melosa16: Ah! A newcomer! Welcome, and thanks for the rating. :) It helps, believe me.

SomethingTree: Horae? Hmm... I don't remember hearing it, but maybe I just wasn't paying attention in those episodes. I'm going to look it up - you're probably right, but I might have to keep calling them Oracles for those who'd otherwise give me a big HUH?! Gotta dumb it down for the little guy and all that. And I'm glad you thought it was in-character! I was beating myself thinking I was completely off-track, but a lot of people have been happy with it, so I'm happy.

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Today was undoubtedly the 'Day of Disappointment'.

Neil had only been down here once before, and in the panicked state he and the others were in, he hadn't had much time to really look at this place. Now, however, as he, Theresa and Herry leisurely strolled down the tunnel, he allowed himself to drink in every detail. Sadly, that had taken all of three seconds. It was such a shame how bored Neil was feeling as they made their way to the Underworld. This place should have been scary - _terrifying_. They were about to enter the land of the dead, and the only thing even _remotely_ creepy being offered was the desolate stone walls. But as he'd told the others eight times in the past seven minutes, he used 'desolate' as loosely as calling a bomb 'friendly'. How embarrassing it was if Hades couldn't even make a stone hall a even a _bit_ eerie.

They should have been kicking their way through a sea of human bones. There should have been torches burning in animal skulls hammered to the walls or dangling from the ceiling. Abnormally sharp rocks should have been jutting out from the ground, ready to pierce straight through the foot of any careless traveller. Spider webs - not the spider, of course, because they'd be dead with everything else - were supposed to be coating every inch of this bland tunnel, sticking to everyone's skin, clothes and hair. There wasn't. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Not even a stinkin' tooth.

Alright, so maybe Neil didn't mind not having to spend the next week picking webbing off of him, but this was ridiculous. This was _his_ adventure. Part of getting a bit of respect around this place was going through a hideously cumbersome (Thank you, Word-a-Day.), overly dangerous, gratuitous fight-scene mess of a trial. But no. Apparently even _that_ was too much to ask for.

"Theresa," he said suddenly.

"If this about that stupid 'using desolate loosely' thing again, I don't want to hear it."

"No, not that, even if it's completely true." Neil pointed to a tiny crack in the wall. "What's that?"

"What's what?" Theresa asked.

"That. That right there. Sticking out of the wall."

"_What's_ sticking out of the wall?"

Herry looked for himself. "You mean the flower?"

"Exactly." Neil frowned. "There's a flower in the wall." When he received no reaction from this, he prompted, "A _flower_. In _here_."

"What's wrong with having a flower down here?" Herry said. "I like flowers."

He shook his head. "Herry, Herry, Herry... Don't you have any idea where we are?"

"Uh... Here?"

"Yes, Herry. Good job. Now, _where's_ here?"

"... A tunnel?"

"Very good. A tunnel to _where_?"

Herry said nothing for a moment. He thought hard about his answer, and with a decisive nod of his head, said, "To the Underworld."

"_Exactly!_" Neil cried. He threw his hands into the air. "We're on our way to the Underworld, and there's flowers sticking out of the walls! What kind of message is that?"

"... That everything's going to be okay?"

"_Exactly!_" Neil said again. "This is absolutely terrible. Herry, go yank that flower out."

Herry began to move towards the helpless plant, but Theresa stopped him. "Neil, don't be ridiculous. It's just a flower."

"'Just a flower'?" Neil echoed. "_'Just_ a flower'? Theresa, that _flower _is going against every requirement for a proper quest. We should be battling demons and solving ancient riddles and rescuing treasure boxes which turn out to be empty because the whole lesson was in _getting_ the stupid thing - not skipping down boring tunnels filled with _flowers_!"

"We're not skipping," Herry said.

"Herry, just sit down."

Theresa rolled her eyes. "Neil, if any demons popped out right now, _we'd_ be the ones fighting them. You would do what you always do - hide behind the biggest thing you can find and wait for it to be over."

"I most certainly would _not_," Neil snapped. Theresa looked at him. "... Well, okay, but not on a quest like this."

"And this quest," Theresa said, "is different from all the other quests... how?"

"It's _mine_," he replied. "Of course I'd help."

She rolled her eyes again. "Neil, calm down. I'd thought you be happy to have an A to B type of 'adventure'. The only work this involves is walking around. With any luck, we'll be back by the end of the day."

"_Luck_?" Neil grit his teeth. "I see how it is. Whenever I go on _my_ quests, everyone expects it to be the easiest thing in the world. You guys think I can't handle myself, don't you?"

"Neil, we didn't -"

"I'll prove I deserve as much credit as anyone else!" Neil began stomping down the tunnel. "As soon as something comes up, I'm handling it _by_ _myself_!"

"Neil!" Theresa called after him. He ignored her, so she turned to Herry. "We better hurry and make sure he doesn't do anything stupid."

"Yeah," Herry said. "... Can I stand up now?"

"Yes, Herry," she sighed. "You can stand up."

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The ferry ride had been pleasant enough. Neil said it made up for Persephone's ring of trees around the tunnel's end, and so Herry and Theresa were spared from any more of his complaints. As Theresa lingered behind to pay Charon when they'd banked on the other side of the ride, Herry and Neil paced just in view of the great gate.

"This place hasn't changed much," Herry murmured. "It's as creepy as ever."

"Not creepy enough, though," Neil said. "Hopefully we run into zombies or something."

"Odie said there weren't any zombies down here," Herry said. "He told me that zombies only existed when they were_ out_ of the Underworld. Inside, they were just spirits like everything else."

"Yeah, well, what does Odie know?"

"... Everything."

"Besides that."

"Everything... else?"

Just as Neil was about to reply, Theresa strolled up. "Alright, boys. We're ready to go."

"Finally!" Neil said. "Maybe we'll actually come up against something dangerous."

"Yeah," said Theresa. "Wouldn't _that_ be awesome?"

He missed the sarcasm. "See? Now you're beginning to understand."

The gate was swung open just enough for them to squeeze through. They paused for a moment, trying to gather their bearings, studying the familiar, barren landscape ("The _proper_ kind of barren," Neil said.) that lay before them. They'd only been still for a moment, however, when a great thumping sound echoed in the distance. But it got louder and closer in seconds. Then, hardly having time to ask what was going on, a wave of rotten breath washed over them, and the mini-earthquakes that followed with the thumps knocked them to their feet. A mass of teeth jumped out at them, and three slimy tongues were dragged over them, almost crushing their faces.

"Hey," Herry said, laughing when he got a chance to breath. "Look who's here!"

"Ew! Ew-ew-ew!" There was a fierce thrashing between Neil and the tongue, but finally he managed to wriggle away. "Oh, wow - _ew_! I'm covered in immortal dog spit! Do any of you know where that _tongue_ could have been?"

"Where else?" Theresa said, rolling away as well. "All over its immortal bum."

Neil shrieked.

"It's great to see you again, Cerberus!" Herry said. He didn't seem to mind that Cerberus had all three tongues pinned on him, the crazy dog fan. "Okay, okay! Let me up, will you?"

"Aww," Theresa said. "Look how cute Cerberus is when he plays. I should have brought my camera."

"This is _so_ unfair! Even that stupid guard dog's friendly! We may as well go back to the tunnel and make a wreath of flowers for it." Neil scowled. He glared at the back of Herry's head, who was busy playing fetch with a bone he'd found in the sand. "I'm getting totally gypped."

"Neil, you know he only attacks when you try to leave," Theresa said.

"Then we're leaving through _this_ door."

"Don't be stupid," Theresa told him. "We're going to use the gavel of Aeacus again. There's no way I'm going to let you put us into danger just so you can meet your 'requirements'."

Now he glared at her. "You're so selfish."

"Hey! Neil! Theresa!" Herry called. "I think we can ride on Cerberus' back to Achilles instead of having to walk. I mean, as long as we keep going _in_, he should be okay, right?"

"Oh, goodie," Neil growled. "Now we get to ride _on_ that slobbery thing, thus taking away one of the few remaining obstacles we actually had. Great. Wonderful."

"Neil, _relax_," Theresa said. "Great job, Herry. Get out stuff onto his back, okay?" She looked over at Neil, who had one of the most miserable faces she'd seen. "Don't worry. I'm sure once we get to Achilles, there's bound to be some danger for you to get us out of, okay?"

He perked up a little at the thought of it. "Yeah, he's surrounded by the war, isn't he? Alright, that should make this a bit more challenging."

"And besides," Theresa added. "There's no showers around here. Do you really want to get all sweaty walking?"

"You've convinced me, dear Theresa. I shall ride atop that mangy beast." Neil wagged a finger at her. "But I swear, if I get off that thing smelling like it, there's gonna be Hell to pay."

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**D/N:** So, I think I've left myself at a pretty easy place to continue. This means a quick update. Hooray! Anyway, please **rate** my in-character-ness from **1-10**. I took a couple of liberties, but hopefully I did alright.


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